And then I felt really sad because I thought maybe I was different from how Mary Elizabeth originally saw me, too.

I really do wish I knew better responses for when people spill their guts about something important involving me. Instead, I spend hours ignoring it and hoping it will go away. When I finally decide to somehow re-open the doors of communication, the only thing I can think to say is, "What's up?"

"What's up?"

How fucking pathetic and afraid can I really be? Do I really expect this to go away? Should I talk to someone else about it?

Answers: Very. No. I have no one to talk to about it.

I just wish I knew someone who would be completely out of the equation.

I'm not questioning my feelings. I know exactly how I feel, and I can't reciprocate. I'm sorry. I just wish I knew how to go about handling it.

I get the feeling I'll just run to Oregon, and hope it goes away. But, this is one of my best friends we're talking about. The last thing I want is to kill all forms of communication between us. Fuck my life.

It's bad timing. It's the worst timing. I moved on. I'm happy. I'm ready for my future. I can't be yours.

I don't think this will make sense to anybody. I don't even think it makes sense to me.

This is ridiculous. I just need to grow a pair and set everything straight as opposed to pretending like nothing was ever said. I can't say that  I know how to do that. I've never been in this sort of position.

I think some people stay in relationships because they're satisfied, and they don't want to ruin it. It's different for me. I'm actually happy. I'm more than satisfied. And, I never want to lose that.

Either way, I'm blowing this out of proportion.
Also, The Creek smells like weed, and I need a shower.